Wednesday, May 06, 2009

Moving...on.


I used to joke that in every semester of college I was someone different. I was still me of course but, every different semester posed so many new discoveries, challenges, environments, friends and dramas that looking back I feel that in almost every situation I was reinvented.


As a freshman I was a theatre major. I wore yoga pants to class because we had kineseology exercises (not to mention it was at 8am), I lived with my best friend, I was immersed in theatre and discovering all the newness that college brings. I also had a great crush... The next semester I switched to design, lived alone, and dressed up for class everyday (I also didnt have a class before 11 am). The next two were not insanely different but were definitely a departure from the first year as I lived with 3 other girls and the main focus of life was passing the entrance exams to the professional level for design and well of course...blowing off class to go to The City. I had a major family dsyfunction, 4 potent crushes and maybe even a bit-o-love. The next year I was recovering from my bit-o-love and was completely reinvented almost to being unrecognizable, worked insanely at both my job and school, barely slept, had a enormous year long falling out with my best friend and then almost with my other best friend and really ended the year not knowing what my future would look like upon my return. The next two are a little blurry..or slurry but they are by far the most important. There was a lot more love and the rekindling of friendships, a lot of leadership responsibilities and the biggest life change of all - Kyle.


All of this to say that with all those things that were going on in my life I was often almost a different person in each moment as I was learning so many different things about myself through each adventure. By the time I moved to Florida I thought I knew myself inside and out. And I did - as a single girl; but what I have learned in my time since college is who I am in a relationship and who I am in love. It was shocking at times, fulfilling, sometimes scary, and amazingly wonderful and is a time that will always be stored in a sacred chamber of my heart. I will cherish these years here because they are when I fell in love, became an adult, got married and began to learn what it means to share a life with someone.


I am so anxious to see what this next chapter holds for me, in what ways will I grow and reinvent in this new place? What new memories are there to make there and how far away will these years in Florida soon seem to me?


As we pack up our home, cancel cable, forward mail, and plan for this ever nearing life change what can we do to preserve this time in our hearts forever?


We have pictures, friendships and most importantly our memories but, as all things fade with time I hope that we take something with us deeply internal that will stick with us and hold these first years together unmoved and unfading so that we might take them out from time to time and just lounge around with them in our pj's.